Score: 0

"FAKE! FAKE I PROCLAIM!"

submission: Kinen: Demo Version

date: June 20, 2006

that worm was clearly fictional. no way in hell that was a true story! i have seen plenty of worms in my life. big one's, small one's pink one's and even an orange one. but never a green one. hell i've seen a bird eating a worm. but birds live in trees, which grow apples. worms eat apples. apples are sweet, like candy. some candy can even eat birds. ive seen it. my mouse is cordless. and sqweeking! my keyboard doesnt make music. im curling as we speak. restaurants make me anxious. far too many people have acess to my food. you can never let that occur. they could poisen it. chocolate is supposed to be bad for dogs, but has anyone ever tried? i mean if they did, and it was true, then it would be awfull. oranges taste like orange. but what the hell do bannanas taste like? it isnt yellow...maybe green? but that golf. i golf. do you golf? look into a kaleidascope. what do you see? is it fantastic? or will it give me nightmares for a week. wait! someones at the door. no never mind, flase alarm. while wew're on this subject, who uses floppy discs anymore. i mean come on! its called a flash drive, which sounds like something from star wars. who the hell uses flash drives anymore? i carry around a desktop with me. wherever i go. its heavy, but its worth it! rain is cold. why is that? ice is already cold, so why the rain cold?
hey, did you know that it gets dark at night. unless you live really far north, or really far south. did not know that. while we're on that subject, who puts tuna on sandwiches anymore? come on! just because it lives in water, does NOT mean it has to be tasty. i mean, look at mermaides. ive had one of them, and it was not good. not good at all. vietnam makes good, cheap food. ever been? no? well you should. oh my good look at the time!...2:12. you thought i was done. well im not. i shall never be done. that was just my introduction. scared yet, little boy? you will be. you will be. oh, fyi, little known fact, ziploc bags, do not keep legions of the dead at bay. you need renoylds wrap can only accomlish that. if you are truly still reading this during the hours of 1, 4, 99, and 09847659. but only if you are true at heart, and pure evil. BWAHAHa i have termites in my backyard, they are working for the government. they dont know i know. i have several firecrakers at my disposal to rid myself of this wretched curse, sent to me by the warlord, joldan IXIVIXV the third. it involves a checkers game gone awry due to an imbalance between two hormal glands. dont ask. for i shall not speak of it. i have 68 legions of penguins ready to strike at the heart of atlantis, when i make a high pitched squeeling noise, in the direction of the ocean. it sounds like this: aroogah ogan halilililchima. if you hear that, youd better be ready. i shall take the ocean, the the air with my dodo's, the flightless bird. i also have pelicans. but they piss me off. I once crawled out from a train after it exploded due to shampoo, i was quite upset but recovered in the land of the tigers of tazmania. On tuesday i had a taco but it tasted like a pair of headphones. ohh me. oh my. oh my galoshesnit. This is really letting me vent my thoughts, imagine if you were in a box that was just getting smaller. one corner is fire and the other is lightning. i swear i saw it once. no wait twice. what if the moon was a giant marshmellow? i would eat some, the push it towards the earth! it would be be a gooey, delicious, potentially death filled blessing from our lord, zuess. did you know that one time, i ate a turkey whole. it was living as well. it sqwirmed and pecked its way ALL the way down. The color red i mean what the hell is up with that color. Its red. red... Did you know that glass swans are truelly plastic. 3PO where are you, where could he be that little bastard i hate him. Im sorry come back dont leave aww. Which brings me to my next point that worm was clearly not real. Thank you and good night.
Sincerely TeeCue (god among men, why do mortals even attempt to walk in my realm)